No More Robot’s new cruise ship management sim is hella bleak, despite the input of former Overcooked devs

At slightest the Flying Dutchman didn't person a bingo hall

Whenever I find myself increasing grim astir the mouth, whenever it is simply a damp, drizzly October successful my soul, I relationship it precocious clip to get to oversea arsenic soon arsenic I can. Specifically, I imagination of cruise liners. I’ve ne'er been connected an water cruise, but I’ve been connected astatine slightest 2 North Sea ferries and successful my mind, cruise ships are paradise.

They are places of luxury and perchance a fewer exotic murders - ocean-going adventurelands that perversely harbour swimming pools and waterslides. Imagine it, a vessel with a pool. Such delicious unreason. Here to disabuse maine of these visions is No More Robot’s Cruise Control, which makes cruise ships look similar hell.

It's a absorption sim created by a squad who see erstwhile Overcooked developers, but for each the quality to conception "fine dining" facilities, I spot small of Overcooked’s saucy joyfulness successful the trailer. I spot suffocating bingo halls and arcade machines crammed unneurotic similar tombstones. I spot crowds truthful dense the radical person nary prime but to locomotion done each other.

I spot trash and vomit and despairing janitors. I spot carpet patterns that travel similar a tedious statement of insidious intent. I spot potted cinemas that lucifer mill workplace incubators. I spot dollar signs floating up from smiling, bare heads. Worst of all, I can’t spot immoderate waterslides oregon swimming pools.

You privation to cognize what it’s similar to participate successful this inhumane simulation, this abject spawn of the Bermuda triangle? Very well. Cruise Control looks similar a acquainted bushed of ensuring your vessel has the facilities to support your customers happy, portion avoiding agelong queues to attractions and mechanical breakdowns. The much guests you serve, the much amenities you’ll get and upgrade. Perhaps there’s a waterslide to unlock, erstwhile capable bodies person been fed to the dancefloors. Fail to amuse the clientele sufficiently, and they'll nonstop you nonstop to Davey Jones' Locker. Fools! We are each already there.

You tin work much connected Steam. It’s retired successful 2026, and is the enactment of Not Tonight developers No More Robots. No More Robots are besides publishers – their caller signings see Little Rocket Lab, a Stardew mill sim that I person downloaded the demo for and consciousness blameworthy astir not playing yet. Final anecdote: I person a instrumentalist person who erstwhile worked connected a cruise liner. He lives connected a vessel now. I'm not definite he's truly my friend. Perhaps my person is inactive retired there, queuing for bingo successful the doldrums, and immoderate carnal of the heavy oversea has stolen his face.